Guidance for Soulmate Finding Journey

It is often requested that I help people to find their soulmate.  The challenge with finding this wonderful person, is that most people have not specified and narrowed down exactly what they are looking for in a match!  People dream of one day meeting this ideal person for their lives, but are not clear about the kind of person that is ideal.

I created the concept of "the List" to help people in narrowing down exactly what they are looking for in a soulmate.  Sometimes creating this list and putting it out into the universe or through prayer is enough.  Once you have identified what you are looking for, the laws of attraction or the power of intention can come into play and soon enough, this person appears in your life.

The challenge with this method is two-fold.  First, finding and creating this successful relationship involves letting go of limiting beliefs that you are not good enough, not worthy, or unable to find this wonderful person.  Many of us go through many relationships and heartbreaks before finding the person that complements us and that can maintain a stable, happy, loving and successful relationship. 

The second challenge is in creating a list that is so specific that you get what you ask for.  Often, people will create a list and tell me they got exactly what they asked for...but they forgot to mention some other things they wanted or some things they didn't want!  We all learn in life through love, relationships, experiences and failures.  It's ok to make mistakes.  We all do!

I can help you with the process of getting ready to find your soulmate.  Below I have listed information on "the List" and the process of creating it.  If you are ready to take the next step on your soulmate journey, please contact me to set up a reading.

The List

The answer to finding "the one" was far simpler than I would have ever imagined. You have to know who and what your soulmate is before you ask the universe to send them to you! Imagine that you are searching for a car. Would you go onto a car lot and tell the sales person, "Give me something with wheels." No, you would be more successful if you knew the specifics of what type vehicle would suit you best. Why would you be less diligent in choosing something far more important such as a life mate?

So, to that end, you must make a list, a very specific list. Please bear in mind here that I am not talking about just the sort of thing you would put in a singles advertisement. I am talking about a list that removes every person but one, THE ONE. It is okay to include, "Likes long walks on the beach and cats" but you will need much, much more.

To begin, create a list of everyone you have ever dated or even been attracted to. Under each of their names you will create two separate sections. One section will describe what you found attractive in that person, everything that made you think that they were special and meant for you. The second section will list everything that you did NOT like about them, everything that made you realize that they were not THE ONE. Go into great detail in both these lists, everything from hair color to eye color, the way they spoke, the way they dressed and so on. You get the point. The more specific you are the better the final result will be.

Special Note: The lists can and should include even others you have just seen or noticed, movie stars, someone who works with you, even someone you pass on the street that attracts or repels you. The more the merrier.

Once these lists are complete you can then begin using them as the source for your master list. Concerning physical appearance, look over your other lists and find the things that strike you the most strongly. If most of the people that interested you have brown hair, put that down. If most have blue eyes, put THAT down and so on. You should include height, weight and other very specific details. Pretend you are describing your ideal mate to a sight impaired friend. At the end of this list, not only will YOU be able to recognize them but anyone else who has read your list will too.

After you have completed the "physical" description you get into the tricky part, the things that make up the personality of your ideal mate. The same rules apply here as in the physical category...the more specific, the better. Bear in mind that the person should not necessarily be a mirror of you. If you love cats, for example, it is not necessary that THEY love cats as much as you, only that they will happily tolerate cats in the home. If they are exactly like you then you have removed the possibility of growth in the relationship. The things that you can teach each other make the relationship a real joy.

Okay, now we get to the tricky part...In making your lists, physical or personality, you cannot use the words NO or NOT. The universe doesn't seem to hear them. Therefore, everything is listed as a positive. For example: You would not say, "My ideal mate is not an alcoholic" you would be better served using something like I did like..."My ideal mate is free from addictions to drugs, alcohol and other substances and behaviors." I realize that covers a lot of territory but trust me, you will be glad you put this one in.

Another example might be...instead of saying "My ideal mate is not bald" you would say, "my ideal mate has a full head of hair". I realize this is tricky phrasing but it is worth the effort, I promise.

Work on this list long enough so you KNOW them. When I was making my list someone told me that my list was too specific. They said to me, "You are eliminating EVERYONE!" I looked back at my list and replied, "No, I am eliminating everyone but ONE and one is all I need or want."

If your soulmate list is shorter than the best part of two type written pages then you have not put enough effort and thought into it. Go back and get specific!" I suggest that you work on the list for a while, put it away for a week or two, and then haul it out and look it over with a fresh eye. When you can look at it and KNOW this is your always mate then it is complete.

Special Note: Make sure you include availability. I.E. "My ideal mate is in a perfect place in their life to accept me as their life mate. All other past relationships in their life are through and completed." Let's face it, how many relationships do YOU know that, on the face if it, would have been perfect but that one or the other of the two were not totally over a past relationship. The walking wounded make lousy mates. You don't want someone who needs fixing. You want someone who is ready willing and able to be with YOU and ONLY YOU.

So, what do you do when the list IS complete? Not much really. You simple acknowledge to yourself and the universe that THIS is your mate and ask the universe to send them to you. If you like rituals (and I am one of these), make a copy of your list then take the copy to a safe place and burn it, adding in a prayer that this person be sent to you in the here and now. Then you simply wait (usually not very long but be a bit patient). Here is the neat part…They will come to YOU!

My Soulmate Story

Allow me to give as an example how it worked in my own case. Even though I did not think that I had any real preference for hair and eye color, I put down red hair and green eyes. I finished my list and put it out to the universe. In about two weeks I received a call from a lady I had apparently read at one time. I did not remember her or what she looked like since I read many, many people.  I have a poor memory of what people look like, and I was once a newspaper reporter so have been in contact with a lot of people.

This lady asked me if she could ask me a couple personal questions. I told her sure, why not. She asked me if I was married. I told her no. She asked, "Are you dating anyone at this time?" Again the answer was no (I didn't mention at that time that I had not dated in four years by my own choice). She then proceeded to ask me to dinner. To this day I am not sure why I broke that four year "dating fast" and agreed to go out with someone I did not know but I did. We agreed to meet at a psychic festival that weekend. I asked her how I would know her and she replied, "Don't worry, I will know you."

With all this in mind I headed out to the show, all the time wondering why I had agreed to a date with a complete stranger. During the show a gorgeous redhead walked into the show and sat down with another reader and friend of mine. My first thought was, "How do I ditch my blind date and ask THIS woman out?" Because I knew that she was THE ONE. As you have probably already guessed, she WAS my date.

A little more irony...not only was she my date but earlier, I had told the friend she sat down with that I had "broken my fast" and agreed to a blind date. It turns out that he also knew the redhead and knew that she was coming to the show to meet someone but he never drew the connection. So, after I determined that they were just talking and not doing a reading (after you have done it a while you get to know the difference), I started making up reasons to saunter by and nod to my friend and then get him to introduce me to HIS friend the redhead.

After a bit, my friend did have a client come up so the redhead (thank you spirit) told him that she would just come talk with me while he did his reading. Happy as a clam over the turn of events, we chatted for a few minutes until she told me, "let me do a reading for YOU." Well this does happen on occasion so I agreed. She took my hand and told me, "You have a date tonight with a drop-dead gorgeous redhead!" Well, after getting over my stunned shock, I figured out that she was indeed my date for the evening.

Long story short, I told her I loved her on our second date and by the end of the date we were talking marriage (the long story is even more hilarious - ask me about it sometime). We were indeed married three months after that and that was, as I said, twenty-two wonderful years ago. Special note: I told her later that I had "created her" and showed her my list. She laughed and told me that SHE had created ME, reached in her purse and pulled out HER list which described me to a tee.

Since that time, I have given this advice to many, many people and it has resulted in dozens of marriages or life commitments with those who followed the advice. So, good luck in your own search. I hope this advice comes in handy and that you find your soulmate as I have. If would like additional assistance with your soulmate finding journey, contact me to set up a reading.